Little Levi's Big Day.............

This morning was Levi's CT scan and he did really well. He's a brave little buggar!! They strapped him down to the table and he started to fuss but then the table started to move and he started smiling and giggling a little bit... He like the ride!! Now we're just waiting on the results. While we were getting on the elevator we saw a little girl that was like 3 or 4 with no hair and the grayness look to her skin that is the tell tale sign of cancer.... She was smiling with her mom and in good spirits. It broke my heart, to see such a young little girl having to go through all of that and her parents....Her parents the worry and the strength they must have. I didn't know them not even their name but as we were getting off of the elevator I said a prayer for them. And of course my mommy worry kicks in as we wait for the results of Little Levi's scan....This parenting thing is gonna give me grey hair before I even get to 24 and a half!!!

Peace and chicken grease~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gallery Day...........

So this is one piece of my sister's art work that I really like among others. I've decided to have a gallery day once a week or so to showplace her work. She's the best artist out there, of course I my be a little bias...... This is called "Women Eating Meat". You can purchase this and all the ones I post at our etsy store... Spacedogstudios. The like is to the right!! Enjoy....................

Ever feel like your a stranger to yourself?

My Jeans speaks to Me....What do yours do?

Ok so American Idol was not the best night last night....Was it just me or did most of them suck? They had a great theme and I was excited but for the most part I was disappointed. Except I must give major props to my girl Mandessa! She saw her platform and opportunity and took it....Good for her!!! Should we all be more courageous and open. And of course it wasn't Chris's best night, but He's still the best in my eyes, he can do no wrong.....As I say "That's my huusssbaand, girl"!!!! Its a little joke around our place. So anyway I'm not sure whos going home but I'm thinking either Kelly, Lisa or Ace.......Time will tell.

So I never thought I'd get an inspirational message from a pair of jeans.... But oddly enough I did...... I bought a pair of younique jeans, which by the way I love, and attached to the tags was their own little tag with a poem of sorts.....Its very inspiring... Here it is......

you are exceptional
you are inimitable
you are distinctive
you are matchless
you are irreplaceable
you are rare
you are brilliant
you are special
you are extraordinary
you are incomparable
you are excellent
you are an individual
you are ..... Younique.

So there ya have it not bad huh? Something I think we all need to hear from time to time. I didn't expect though to hear it from my jeans however!!!!

Peace~~~

The Day After The Waiting Game...........

Ok so I'm sure you are all oh so wondering what happened and if I ever got called back from the Dr. Well it was a little stressful there for awhile when I started to get pissed of that it was after the office closed and still NOONE had called me back... But then at 6:30 when I was all ready to go in there tomorrow and raise some you know what, the phone rang and it was the Doctor herself. She said she waited until after closing to call me because she would need to discuss things and didn't want to have to rush between appointments.... Boy did I feel sheepish!!! Any way since Levi can't clear up from this infection and its been over two months now and many rounds of antibiotic and steroids later she fears a sinus problem, so she sending us to Akron Children's Hospital on Friday for a CAT Scan, the poor guy!! If it shows what she's thinking than we're looking at major surgery.....And since none of the ENT up here do it, they just do tubes and stuff, we would be off to Cleveland Clinic unless she can find one at Akron....... Needless to say I'm a basket case!!!! That's my baby... So that's the scoop, that's the news I waited ALL day to hear...... Enter sarcasm here...........

On a good note though Femmie came over and had lunch with me today so it gave me a chance to talk it through and out.... So that helped ALOT!! Thanks Femmie..........

that's all for now I just wanted to update everyone I know you were all just hanging by a thread...heheheh.....

The Waiting Game..........

Ok so, I was looking through a Magazine today waiting for the doctor to call me back....And I was once again irritated. They had in their "Must Have" Fashion section a night gown, that was beautiful, but it was 595.00!! I just sat there shaking my head.... 595.00 for ONE night gown??? If you spend that kind of money on ONE night gown than you have more money than since! I don't mean to offend anyone here, but honestly now 595.00 for ONE night gown IS offensive!!!

Back to the "waiting for the doctor to call me back" thing mentioned above........ Why is it that when you are waiting for the doctor to call you back you can't do anything constructive? I mean as a stay at home mom with twins that have an immune defincency, I'm always at home and always have plenty to do!! But now that I'm here waiting on this phone call I feel trapped in my house, I can't get any work done.....I'm just in waiting mode. Which if you know me but at all, you know that I HATE that mode!!!! There's nothing worse than feeling as though you have waited around all day for a phone call or for someone to show up... Just waiting is exhausting. I'm soo tired and I haven't done a damn thing all day!! Wait... Does this blog entry count?

Any way Levi has started with a stuffy running nose with as the doctor calls it "green discharge" and today spiked a fever once again.... Of course he has been of he's fourth round of antibiotics and prenosione for two full days now, so that's about the right timing!! We are at the point now that I need answers and something needs to be done... I don't want him to constantly be on antibiotics and steroids! So as I have mentioned before, I'm waiting on the doctor to call back......UGGGHHGG....................

I Can't take It!!!!!!!!

I do not understand the need for this commercial for Lamisil.... It just grosses me out. Which is pretty hard to do especially with a cartoon but uugghh I can't watch it!! Now I love watching shows that show live surgeries and shows like "Life in the ER" and what not, Hey I even wanted to watch my own C-section, but the wouldn't let me, so I don't gross out easily. However there is just something about this gross little being lifting up a toenail and then preceding to crawl under it, that I just can't take let alone watch!!!! Cartoon or not. It's just wrong.......

The Little Guys...........

This is the little guys soo tired they fell asleep playing!!! I just had to take a picture!! (carter's in front, Levi's in the back).

This is our future entertainer, Carter, every night he gets up on he's little stool and does all the tricks he knows!! He loves and audience!!! As you can see below he even applauds himself!!!!

Just a few pics I thought ya all would get a kick out of!!! Levi hasn't been feeling well but I'll get some of him in the next few days....Today he started to feel better at least we hope!! He's fits could've scared off the devil himself!!! Ummm maybe that's a good thing........

Until Next Time......Peace~~~~~~~~~~~~

The 10:00 News..........

Ok so a couple of days ago at a high school up in Cleveland somewhere these white girls wrote some graffiti on a bathroom wall..... What did they write? Something to the effect of "all blacks will die at 12 O'clock"!!! Horrible right? So of course since Columbine every threat is taken seriously so parents came to pick up there kids and take them out of school. This is the comment however that started me yelling at the TV.......When the news interviewed the cop that happened to be white he says...And I quote...."I don't think the girls knew the gravity of their words"........What the Hell!!!!!!!!!?????? They're in HIGH School!! They knew exactly the gravity of their words they just didn't think they'd get caught!!! If we want the youth of America to start to step up then when need to give them credit for the good and the bad they do. You can't say that a 14 year old is adult enough to be tried as an adult in court for murder, but that a 16 year old isn't mature enough to know the gravity of their words, especially hate words!! It just irritated me to know end!! They knew, they knew, they knew............. Case closed.

On a different subject: Thanks everyone who commented on my little survey I really appreciate it, and you can still comment if you didn't already!! Oh and just to be fair I'll answer as well: It was I who said it first. It was received with a big smile a great Kiss and an "I Love You" right back.

until Next Time.........Peace~~~~~~~~~

A Little Survey...........

A little survey if you will..... Please leave your answer as a comment....

Who said "I Love You First" in your relationship?

Untill Next Time...... Peace~~~~~~~~~~

Here We Go Again...........

Well its off to the Doctors again for the twins...... They're fevers finally went down after six days!! However they are still very congested after being on antibiotics since Thursday. So she wants to see them today at 2:30. So here we go again!!! We do have however a new word from Levi.... REAADDYY. That's right he says "ready" after you ask him if he's ready. Its too cute!!

I had a little baby yesterday!! My sister-in -law is a foster parent and she has a new placement...Hes too cute!! Hes name is Keeno and hes six months old and only weighs like 12 pounds!!! He's a peanut..... Levi was a little peeved that he was here and that he's Mom was holding another baby... But he finally warmed up. Carter on the other hand really like him.... He gave him kisses and talked to him and hug him. I had him while she took my nephew to the ER. He's had an ear infection for 5 weeks now!! Poor guy.. he's to see an ENT and may be getting tubes put in!! Keep him in your prayers!!

And finally I would like to petition that we do away with the letter verification when you leave a comment on others blogs!! Some of them are really hard to read. I had to retype the one on Mos's blog twice just to leave my little comment. Am I the only one whose having trouble with those things?

Until Next time......Peace~~~~~~~~~~

My Little Men.............

Newsweek gets me again.......

There's an article in this weeks newsweek about the polygamists movement. Now come on.... Get this there are activist out there trying to get polygamy decrimminalize. First of all I'm sure the cops thank you for being activist about it cause now they know who is....... Second I have to say who wants more than one spouse anyway.......And don't you find it telling about the genders that its only ever one man with a bunch of wives and never one women with all these husbands? Personally though I don't think it should consume all the police's time if they want to do fine that's there life...... Personally I can't imagine even wanting more than one spouse!! There argument though is VERY amusing!! They say that since the Gay marriage movement came about its their turn for equal rights as well saying and I quote..." If Heather can have two mommies why can't she have one daddy and a bunch of mommies?" LOL What the Hell???? I just thought while you have the right to feel that if you like, that it was the funniest reasoning I have ever heard!!! Just the way they worded it I couldn't help but laugh...... The worst part? HBO is starting a new series called "Big Love", which HBO says and I quote..."Offers a sympathic look at polygamous", yeah whatever... More like a pathetic look on it!!!!

So Femmie and I were talking about all the police power they have out their fighting prostitution and we decided they should spend their time on actual crimes and stop worrying about who's sleeping with who and for how much....... I mean as long as their all consenting adults, if that's what she wants to do to "earn" her living that's on her and she will be judge when its her time, however there are worse crimes being committed I.E. rape, murder, drug trafficking, kidnapping, abuse.....And on and on..... That are to me more important. Cause like I told Femmie, all men pay for sex, granted they don't hand over cash for it to random walkers, but believe me if their in a relationship with a women they PAY for sex!!!!! Thought you'd find that a little funny guys...... If there are any that read this that is!!!!

Until next time......Peace~~~~~~~~~

I Have Fallen Prey............

I have fallen prey to the pop culture that is American Idol!! I usually do not get into modern TV shows.....Preferring instead great classics like The Mary Tyler Moore Show!! Though I do like my Law and Order SVU!! But this Idol thing has just gotten me!! All I have to say is that Chris is winning it....All the way...You heard it here first the man can't go wrong!!!

I have also fallen prey to looking forward to getting my weekly Newsweek....How old am I right? I like keeping up on the issues and It also gives me a reason to feel better about myself in the midst of all the stupid people out there!! For instance the hot issue of the moment on reversing Roe V. Wade......... Now I am Strongly pro-life therefore strongly for it. And think the reversal shows that finally things are gonna in the right direction. I always thought it odd that if you kill a women who is pregnant than you are going down for not one but two murders..... But women can have abortions and that's not murder? It's just a double standard in my opinion. The law says its because the mother has the choice rather to terminate and if killed she doesn't...But the killer also has the choice rather to murder that women and when he does that's murder that's a crime....I see no difference. And who are you even if you are the mother to say that the child doesn't get a chance at life? God may have a plan for that little one and your steppin in the way for your own selfish reasons..... Yes its your body and your choices, but you should of thought about that and your sitsuation before having sex. It's your choice what you do with your body... Not another's!! And a baby has a heart beat at 4 weeks...... You don't even know you're pregnant until 5 or 6 weeks....... I rest my case.

Until next time....Peace~~~~~~~~

Mail From The Man Whose Always In My Corner.....

So In response to yesterdays blog I received an email from my dad or as I still like to call him ....Daddy. This is one of the many reasons I'm lucky and need to be reminded of from time to time..... He's always been there for me, is always in my corner, and has always loved me no matter what. Here is the email he sent me hope it touches you the way it did me............. I love you daddy thanks for everything.......................

Katie,

I know I'm your Dad, and you think I'm biased, but I read your blog, and I have something to say. First I hope I not part of the tired problem(if I am please let me know), I know I have trouble not being Dad, but I hope you know that I love you very much and I know I worry about youtoo much. I think it's part of my genetics (grand-ma W.). All that aside, I want you to know how proud I am of youaccomplishments. Your a great Mother, a good wife, accountant,homemaker, sister, and Daughter. When I read your I'm tired blog, I understood and related t a lot ofit. Take heart, you are grown up, you have experienced more in your 24years than some have in their lifetime.There is a saying I like "don't let the bastards wear you down". I like it because it helps my attitude, and helps me keep others in perspective. You have a great family, and if all the things you dreamed of come to you or not, take pride in the fact that you are loved by your husband, children, and family. There are people that gain everything, but have nothing, and people who gain nothing but have everything. Attached is a poem that I have on my desk at work. Read it, I hope youfind it helpfull. Be strong, fight the good fight, never give up, and know you are loved.
Love, Dad

The longer I live
The more I realize the impact of attitude on life.
Attitude, to me, is more important than the past,
Than education,
Than money,
Than circumstances,
Than failures,
Than success,
Than what other people think or say or do.
It is more important than appearance,
Giftedness or skill.
It will make or break an organization,
A school, a home.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day
Regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day.
We cannot change our past.
We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.
We cannot change the inevitable.

The only thing we can do
Is play the string we have.
And that is our attitude.
I am convinced that life is 10 percent what happens to me> And 90 percent how I react to it.
And so it is with you.

--- By Charles Swindell

Tired.....(let me express my feelings a little)

Tired of always feeling tired

Tired of the grey ceiling on the earth...(great song by Sister Hazel "your winter")

Tired of being surrounded by these four walls

Tired of people treating others with such disrespect

Tired of acting like nothing happened when others have wronged me

Tired of not standing up for myself

Tired of people not listening

Tired of nothing changing

Tired of hearing only bad news

Tired of feeling guilty.....For things I can't control

Tired of feeling not good enough

Tired of Christians who think Christianity means opinions and judgment

Tired of unwanted advice

Tired of never feeling like I've grown up

Tired of feeling older than I am

Tired of waiting for our dreams

Tired of watching them slip on by

Tired of others judgments when they know not of the others situation

Tired of always being the one whose kept waiting

Tired of wanting to do things and not having the courage

Tired of caring what others may think or say

Tired of others telling me how and what to feel

"I'm just a little Tired"...................Peace~~~~~~~~~~~~

Courage

" Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage"
~~ Anais Nin

Living up to it..............

So I was taking a shower this morning.....And started looking around at the names of my products I use. I had conditioner on my hair that had to sit for two minutes....I had some time to kill!! As I read the labels of each one I came to an alarming realization......I don't think I'm living up to my products!!! Examples: Brilliant Brunette, true I am brunette but its not brilliant nor is the shampoo making me brilliant as in giving me this million dollar idea to market! Lovely the perfume by Sara Jessica Parker, well all I can say is I am far from lovely in the morning and after chasing twins around all day I feel far from lovely at any point. Satin Soap now if this is suppose to make my skin feel like satin than its failing me or else I'm failing it by not having satin skin from using it....I'm not sure which and after a minute pondering it my cynical side said it was probably me. Vivid White now this one I got excited about because I though YES I am defiantly Vividly white! Until it hit me that it was my toothpaste.....Damn struck out again!! suave yes at times I have my moments but for the most part I am not suave by any definition. Multi Purpose yes this may be my contact solution but I am happy to say that this one I feel I am living up too!! I am very Multi Purpose around here!!!! Natural Glow Lotion ummm ok yeah I may look as though I'm glowing but that's just sweat...You chase around toddler twin boys all day you'd "glow" too!! Clarity Toner yes clarity would be nice in my crazy life.....And tone? Yeah ok let me get on that!! Always never has one word packed so much meaning....... But this one I am trying to live up to....I may "always" be tired, I may "always" be behind in my cleaning, I may "always" wish for more time, But I will "always" thank God for my boys and my husband, I will "always" feel blessed by them and will "always" Love them with all my heart.

Until next time......Peace~~~~~~~~~

To Clarify...........

I feel I need to clarify my last post as I feel some people have taken it the wrong way to make it sound as though I was feeling sorry for my self......This is not the case. I was simply trying to point out the social double standard there is concerning moms and dads. Maybe this will drive my social general point a little better..... A thought if you will........ A father can go on a weekend trip and no big deal there's nothing extra to plan and noone thinks it odd..... The mother could never do this! A little personal antidote to make my point. Chad has gone to Atlantic city twice to the UFC fights and to Columbus a few times for fights and tournaments......Which is great I was totally supportive of it cause he loves it SO much and seeing UFC live is a great thing most never get to see. However if I were to say I was going to Columbus for the day or weekend to visit my sister.....The first thing out of people's mouths would be...."What about Chad?".....They never said "What about Kate?" when chad said he was going. Its the social double standard of mothers and fathers. I spent one Saturday afternoon away when my sister was up visiting and my dad was all worried about me not going home to eat with Chad and that he'd been with the kids all day! Which he loved and had taken pictures of them and had a great bonding day........ It made me feel like "What? What do you think I do everyday?" (Though I'm sure my dad didn't mean it to upset me or that i shouldn't of taken the afternoon it was just how it came out and I'm sure how I took it... given I'm touchy on the subject as you can see.) I'm not gonna feel bad about one half day out. I rest my case......... And send all the respect out there to husbands like my dear one who don't abide by the double standard and who thinks my getting away for a week end a great idea!! I love you Honey, don't doubt that, I'm just trying to get society to change how they view things!!

until next time................ Peace~~~~~~~~

Angry Housewife Eating Fruit Chews....................

So the other night something was brought to my attention that really made my blood boil. See Chad takes Jui-Jitsu class three times a week.... Which is cool. However I've noticed that lately however when people ask were chad is on class night and I tell them they're all "that's good gets him out its a good stress reliever for him"....... Come again??? Why can't it be a good thing cause he enjoys it? Why's it gotta be to get away and a stress reliever....I'm pretty sure he gets away every day to go to work for 8 sometimes up to 16 hours a day and then comes home a rest cause he was at "work" all day. What do these people think I do all day...And I NEVER get away or get a stress relieve. I counted up all the "jobs" I have here and my God I deserve a break!! I take care of 20month twin boys 24/7, I keep the household, I plan dinners, I cook dinners, I do 20 loads of laundry a week, do the shopping, take care of the budget and the bills, fix things around the house, pluming and what not, I list on ebay and etsy to help get extra money to help make ends meet. Other than Femmie comming over I have no adult conversation all day long. However though to hear people talk Chad deserves all the breaks and stress relieve he can get "because he's at work all day". At least he's job has an ending point. Mine goes on with no "clock out" time. When's it my turn? I fight with the feeling that that's selfish but in my heart I feel you can be a better mother with a break here and there. I love my children with all my heart but sometimes these walls of this tiny apartment just seem to close in on me!! Thing is I don't know what'd I'd do....Everything cost money...Which we don't have extra of. I would love to be able to go out to dinner with my husband for example however that would be way to expensive. We haven't been out to dinner together alone since before the twins were born!! Long time!

Well that's my rant for the the day!! Thanks for sticking with me....

Until Next Time....... Peace~~~~~~~~~

Recall....Recall

So apparently there's been a recall on Fisher Price's laugh and learn learning chair. Which we have two of.... Babies were getting their necks caught in between the table and the chair. So if any of ya all have it you can call 866-552-3914 for a repair kit.

I am officially 24 now and man do I feel old..... On anyone else 24 is young. When I hear that some one is 24 I'm like oh a kid that's young whole life ahead of them.... But on me I'm like where is the time going!! Case in point I saw a book the other day that I thought I might like so I was reading the back to see what it was about and at the bottom was a snippet about the author.....It said she was from Ireland and this was her third best seller....Get this she's 24!!!! What the hell? She's 24 and already has three best sellers under her belt, what have I done? Its stuff like that that I hear that's making 24 hard to handle!!!! Or the girls that you hear about who have great careers and own their own posh homes and pay for their uber chic cars in cash and travel all over..... Their 24....Must: read the article about Lance Armstrong ex-wife in this months Glamour......And you'll know as to where I speak about that!!!

Update: I finally got the twins photo blog film loop updated complete with comments when you click on the individual pics as they go by..... So check it out!!

Idol night tonight girls!!!! Can't wait...Really can't wait for the guys night tomorrow night...ohhh Chris??? I'm waiting with bated breath as to what you'll sing this week...Can't wait.

Until next time.....Peace~~~~~~~~~

Movies? What Movies, Mommy?

So my ooohhh so adorable little men managed to open the entertainment center doors where we keep movies....Even though it was locked with a "baby proof" device. I was doing my morning cleaning when I thought to myself that I hadn't heard them in a while...It's never a good sign when their "quiet" for a period of time!! I peek around the door way into the living room and this is what I see!!!! Just thought I'd share it with everyone.....Now I know that you are just dying to trade places with me, aren't you?
I'm in the process of updating their photo blog film loop so check back.....

Until Next Time.......Peace.....................

I'm Changing...At Least I'm Trying.......

On Sunday I'm turning 24 and I'm looking to start changing my attitude to not get shit on all the time, or at least when I do not to let it bother me so deeply. First thing I;m gonna change is worrying about what other people will think all the time and what they'll feel when we make a family decision that's best for us...If they want to get snippy and moody that their problem not mine and I'm not gonna lose any more sleep over it. Second I'm gonna start looking for the respect I know I deserve. To stand up for myself more. And to know that if Chad and I get a chance to do something together not to feel bad about that causing plans to change. Third, I'm not going to feel bad about decision I need to make that are the best for my babies. If it means not taking them somewhere or what ever so be it...If its better for their touchy health than that's that's..... Not to worry about what others will say or feel. Because in the end it only matters what you feel about your life and how you lived it, and how you loved your family, not how others thought you should have lived it. Those are just a few things I'm gonna start to change.

My sister is an artist and we've created a store of her works, from handmade jewelry to panting, over on etsty.com. You can visit our store and make purchases if you like at http://www.spacedogstudios.etsy.com Check us out and let me know what you think. I'm working on making it a link at the right so you can keep checking on the store to see whats new.....We;re always adding to the inventory. She calls me her business manager... I don;t know about all that but I really think her stuff is great and needs to be seen!!

that's all for now folks....Until next time.....Peace.........................

The Weekly Idol Update...........

The best the best the best!!!!!!!! By a long shot!!! And it has nothing to do with the fact he sang my number two most favorite songs of all time: Fuel's Hemorrhage.....Its a close second to my all time favorite: Live's Lightening Crashes. If he sings that I will defiantly be smitten for life!!!! I totally vote for Chris all the way!!!! He's the best!!!!!!!!!!!!

Until Next Time........Peace............

Do We Sabotage Ourselves?...........

I am conviced that we as women are more critical and more judgmental with each other and ourselves than men are about us. We are always harder on ourselves than we need to be. Thinking that we are worse looking than we are and that we'll never find the right man. Case in point..... I have a friend who will remain nameless, that is looking for a life long mate and says she wants to get married. However everytime a man shows interest she pulls away and then complains there are no good men out there and that men don't like her. She says its because she would rather end it before they can end it...... Theres a problem with this theory....Though its good in theory..... With that attitude you will never get married for you will never let it turn into that. I told her that she can't let fear stop her form living! That she needs to look deep inside her self and ask herself if she doesn't want to continue a relationship with this man because she truly is feeling that he isn't right for her or that she is just stopping it because of self doubt and letting fear rule her life. I hope that she.... And she knows who she is..... Can change her perspective to " I am beautiful and worth it" and not to be so critical of herself as we women tend to be. Sabotaging ourselves from living the life we were meant to live.......

Until next time.....Peace...............